I can’t remember the exact date any more, but I can definitely take you to the place where the LORD SAVED ME by HIS marvelous grace. I remember my family & I preparing for church one Sunday morning in the spring/summer of 1990. My birthday is in May, which is why I am unsure if I accepted Christ when I was 6 or 7. That is the part that makes it hard for me to remember, is whether it was right before or right after my birthday. Nonetheless, that Sunday morning, we all prepared ourselves to get ready and go to church. Once we arrived, my parents went to the main auditorium for service. My sister went with her age group for service & I went into what was called “Super Church” for the children my age. The youth pastor at that time began preaching the gospel message of Jesus Christ and I understood. I understood at such a young age, that I was a sinner and destined for an eternity in hell without Christ’s saving grace. I understood and immediately said in my heart, “I WANT THAT.” I raised my hand for the open call to come forward. I was taken aside and shown through scriptures about how a sinner can be saved. I laid my life and heart over to Christ that day. I called unto HIM and gave HIM my heart & my life over to HIM & only HIM. I found my “first love.” I found my “first love” AGAIN. That missing disorienting emptiness was immediately filled that day. And I praise God all the more for every day that I live to serve HIM. And as with anyone that comes to Jesus’ saving grace & accepts HIM, becomes ecstatic. I was so excited that I had to tell everyone, that “I got saved today.” I told mommy, daddy, sissy, and my grandparents as well. I was so happy & continue to be for Him filling me with HIS holy spirit that has never left.
But See, there is more to this story. When I look at the verse (Rev.2:4 KJV)= Nevertheless I have somewhat against thee, because thou hast left thy first love. I look at it differently than most people. When many are reading the letters to the 7 churches in the book of Revelation, they automatically think that the entire 7 churches are all saved individuals & not talking to the churches as a whole. So when they read the letter to the church of Ephesus & read that they have “left their first love” that these people are merely backslidden Christians, when in all actuality, it is depicting hypocrisy. This is evidenced by the verses stating, “repent, do the first works, & To him that overcometh will I give to eat of the tree of life, which is in the midst of the paradise of God.” This is a picture of salvation like in (Rev 3:20’s) = Behold, I stand at the door, and knock: if any man hear my voice, and open the door, I will come in to him, and will sup with him, and he with me. This is a picture of the consummation of the Holy Spirit into an individual that has opened their heart & given their whole heart unto Jesus Christ. The body of Christ is so extremely fractured today that it isn’t even funny and is filled with ministers of “lying divination” = Ezekial. The letters to the 7 churches in the book of Revelation really depicts today’s events with all the churches today. Just as in with the rest of the world, the churches are filled with both believers & unbelievers; & some of the unbelievers within the churches need to self-examine themselves to see if they are actually of the faith & not believing in a different gospel or a different Jesus. Satan is the author of confusion, not God.
Growing up, there are some controversial doctrinal concepts that has always made sense to me. Some include: eternal security, age of accountability, predestination, and others. For various reasons, I received all my teaching from scripture from the Holy Spirit only. Growing up and the majority of my life, I was never part of the “click” crowd. My reading comprehension as a child royally stunk, and because of that, I preferred listening to the sermons instead of going to children’s church. And, believe it or not, I understood & understood them well. But one day, the Lord convicted me to stop being dependent upon commentaries & sermons. I didn’t listen at first, so just like any parent to a child, received a “whoopin” from the good Lord & HE helped me to lose all my commentary Bibles and made it happen to where I didn’t have access to televised preachers. I thank HIM so much for that. It forced me to read His words only and receive teaching from only HIM. Back to the doctrinal concepts, I never understood why those concepts were so controversial until I got older & became more learned of abiding in HIS word only. Part of the reason is because what the Lord has allowed me to witness & experience.
Before I accepted Jesus Christ as my Lord & savior and having my life long journey of a personal relationship with HIM, I remember waking up one afternoon as a young child from a nap in my mother’s & father’s bedroom. I can’t remember exactly how long this day was BEFORE I had accepted Christ, but there was a time span between this day and the day I gave my life & heart over to HIM. When I woke up, I was confused and disoriented and felt something missing from me. I left my parents’ bedroom & entered into the living room where my mother was curling my sister’s hair with paper rolls for church the next morning. I spoke to my mother & sister, but I was still disoriented and even had to ask them their names. I knew who they were and that they were important to me. I knew that they loved me as well, but I was still disoriented as to why I felt something missing in my soul. I reacquainted myself with my family and allowed my mother to curl my hair as well with the paper curlers. I could tell & feel the love that they had for me, but it was not the same of what I was looking for.
One of the most marvelous gifts that God can give, is the gift of memory. Satan can use your memories to cause you to doubt and set forth stumbling blocks and hinder your walk with Christ; but God gives us our memory of HIS saving grace to shove it in front of the Devil’s face to make him flee. Praise God.
Before I further my testimony, recall the earliest memory that you have. Most people can only remember as far back as when to sometime in their childhood. My waking up disoriented was NOT my first memory.
John 1:9 King James Version (KJV) (Jesus = The WORD) That was the true Light, which lighteth every man that cometh into the world.
This is another passage of scripture that has always made sense to me. I remember listening to a sermon where it was expressed that no-one could really explain this passage truly. Many good commentaries of course, but not truly explain this passage well. I happened to be reading Song of Solomon when I heard that expressed within the video sermon. I may not be able to express it well, but when I heard that, God convicted me to write this very testimony.
Matt 18:18-20 KJV = 18 Verily I say unto you, Whatsoever ye shall bind on earth shall be bound in heaven: and whatsoever ye shall loose on earth shall be loosed in heaven.
19 Again I say unto you, That if two of you shall agree on earth as touching any thing that they shall ask, it shall be done for them of my Father which is in heaven.
20 For where two or three are gathered together in my name, there am I in the midst of them.
All the way back to Genesis when God created Adam & Eve, they were made perfect. We don’t know the exact timing of when they were created to they day they sinned. They dwelt with God in paradise and was given the command to not eat of the tree of knowledge of good & evil. There was a span of time when they walked with God & one day they were given a clear choice of whether to continue to walk with God or not. Adam & Eve eat of the tree of knowledge of good & evil. God’s perfect creation chose to not follow & abide in HIM when they sinned. This in turn exposed their nakedness: their physical nakedness & the nakedness of their adulterated hearts. They “left their first love” and followed the god of self. Even in the beginning, it required a sacrifice to cover their nakedness of their bodies & their hearts, as evidenced by being clothed with animal skins to atone them from their sin. This also shows where they repented and followed God again. They left their god of SELF and found their “first love” again.
My first memory was actually in my mother’s womb. The actual physical details are not what I remember the most. While present there, there was a great love & peace present. There was peace & joy that surpasses all understanding. I can also remember after that, suckling on my mother’s bosom as an infant. That same peace, joy, & great love was still there = that surpasses all understanding. I could feel the love from my mother, but it was not the same as that GREAT love I knew & could feel. God’s presence was with me in the womb. God’s presence was with me when I was suckling, but I couldn’t feel it that one afternoon when I woke up disoriented.
I am unsure if I had truly reached the age of accountability that day, but that Sunday, when I gave my life to Christ, I found “my first love” AGAIN, like Adam & Eve did when their nakedness was covered with the animal skins.
Romans 8:27-30 = 27 And he that searcheth the hearts knoweth what is the mind of the Spirit, because he maketh intercession for the saints according to the will of God.
28 And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose.
29 For whom he did foreknow, he also did predestinate to be conformed to the image of his Son, that he might be the firstborn among many brethren.
30 Moreover whom he did predestinate, them he also called: and whom he called, them he also justified: and whom he justified, them he also glorified.
PREDES’TINATE, a. Predestinated; foreordained.
PREDES’TINATE, v.t. [L. proedestino; proe and destino, to appoint.
To predetermine or foreordain; to appoint or ordain beforehand by an unchangeable purpose.
All predestination is = is talking about God’s plan for mankind.
He knows each and individual ever born & to be born.
He ordained an unchangeable plan how each person can be “conformed” into the image of Christ (being born again).
So that Jesus can be the “firstborn” of many people.
Salvation is a free-will choice. God isn’t going to make that decision for you to love Him. If He did, everyone would be ROBOTS and it wouldn’t be genuine love.
23 Jesus answered and said unto him, If a man love me, he will keep my words: and my Father will love him, and we will come unto him, and make our abode with him.
Song of Solomon 2:4 He brought me to the banqueting house, and his banner over me was love.
I can’t explain it. But Christ is the light that lighteth EVERY MAN in the earth. When I was in the womb, I can remember seeing light. Granted, it could have been physical light, but that peace & understanding was present at the same time. Everyone’s calling unto salvation differs in length and I praise God that mine was not that long. We are made perfect in the womb & dwell with God like Adam & Eve in the garden. Then at some point, understanding is finally reached that gives a clear choice of whether to continue to dwell with God or serve the god of SELF. Once that happens, Christ begins knocking at the door saying, “let me in, let me in.”
Song of Solomon 3:1-4 King James Version (KJV)
3 By night on my bed I sought him whom my soul loveth: I sought him, but I found him not.
2 I will rise now, and go about the city in the streets, and in the broad ways I will seek him whom my soul loveth: I sought him, but I found him not.
3 The watchmen that go about the city found me: to whom I said, Saw ye him whom my soul loveth?
4 It was but a little that I passed from them, but I found him whom my soul loveth: I held him, and would not let him go, until I had brought him into my mother’s house, and into the chamber of her that conceived me.
Just that short time looking for Him, was awful. Christ sealed me that Sunday with the Holy Spirit & I’m a child of God. I am a child of the KING.
Even when John the Baptist was in the womb, leaped at the presence of Jesus.
Luke 1: 41 =And it came to pass, that, when Elisabeth heard the salutation of Mary, the babe leaped in her womb; and Elisabeth was filled with the Holy Ghost:
For the longest time, I didn’t make much mention of my testimony of prior to salvation; but who can you tell some of your deepest part of yourself?: your spouse. I explained to my husband about my testimony, and you know what? He can remember being birthed. That same exact peace was present with him as well. The only difference between myself and him, is that his calling unto salvation was longer than mine. He was apx 35 years old when He accepted Christ with full faith for salvation.
Luke 18:16 = But Jesus called them unto him, and said, Suffer little children to come unto me, and forbid them not: for of such is the kingdom of God.
Despite what some people believe, there will NOT be infants and little children in hell.
Romans 8:17 = And if children, then heirs; heirs of God, and joint-heirs with Christ; if so be that we suffer with him, that we may be also glorified together.
We are commanded to have that UNCONDITIONAL child-like faith. Follow HIM (Jesus) whithersoever he goes.
CALLING UNTO SALVATION (1828 Noah Webster) = To call forth, to bring or summon to action; as, to call forth all the faculties of the mind. = TO SUMMON OR TO BECKON.
BECK, v.t. (1828 Noah Webster) = To call by a nod; to intimate a command to; to notify by a motion of the head.
CALLIING UNTO SALVATION is Jesus coming & knocking at the door of your heart. Rev 3:20 KJV = Behold, I stand at the door, and knock: if any man hear my voice, and open the door, I will come in to him, and will sup with him, and he with me.
IF WE DO NOT OPEN THAT DOOR OF OUR HEARTS & LET HIM ENTER IN = THERE IS NO SALVATION.
Jeremiah 29:13King James Version (KJV)
13 And ye shall seek me, and find me, when ye shall search for me with all your heart.
THE ONLY WAY TO LET JESUS COME IN IS IF WE GIVE OUR ENTIRE HEART OVER TO HIM WITH FULL COMMITMENT OF OURSELVES & TRUSTING SOLELY UPON HIM & NOT OF OURSELVES.
For by grace are ye saved through faith; and that not of yourselves: it is the gift of God:
BEING SEALED WITH THE HOLY SPIRIT OF PROMISE OF EVERLASTING LIFE & UNTIL THE DAY OF REDEMPTION IS FOREVER.
SE’ALED, pp. Furnished with a seal; fastened with a seal; confirmed; closed.
THE SEAL OF THE HOLY SPIRIT IS A KINGLY SEAL & IS ALSO REPRESENTED IN THE SONG OF SOLOMON, AFTER THE CONSUMMATION OF THE HOLY SPIRIT INTO THE BELIEVER. THE SEAL OF A KING CAN NEVER BE BROKEN & THEREFORE =
= Ephesians 4:30b
…the holy Spirit of God, whereby ye are sealed unto the day of redemption.
Despite the fact that scripture vindicates this, it is because of my testimony alone that I know without a shadow of doubt that the Eternal security gospel, the age of accountability, & predestination are true.
Our journey does not begin when Christ starts knocking on the door of our hearts, it begins when HE creates us – like Adam & Eve. Broad is the way to destruction. Jesus rejoices for finding one lost sheep greatly, because they have returned unto HIM.